I’m so scared, terrified of what could happen. I know I should be calm and take it as it comes but I just can’t. I keep asking myself why he choose me out of all these girls and I can’t find a good answer for that. There is rumors and there are people telling me what to do and not, I don’t know what to believe or what to do anymore. I just want to be with him, I guess? It’s hard because I feel alive when I’m with him, I have never felt like this before. I’ve been in relationships that have ended really badly and I’m so scared that it will end up the same again. I know I shouldn’t be thinking that way but what to do?
However this guy bring out the best of me and even though I’m not that comfortable with him jet I feel like I can finally be myself. The last few weekends I’ve been spending time with him and his friends and getting to know these boys that I’ve practically have known my entire life but never talked to. To good to be true right?
Oh god, I don’t know what to do.. I don’t know if the problem is that I can’t admit to myself that I’m in love with this boy or that I’m to scared to love him. Why so hard?